found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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