He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
