Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
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It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
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