you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
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