I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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