none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
