I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Randomize
