i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
So much rum. So many feels.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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