so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
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You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
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Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I have already put on my inside pants.