So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
