This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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