Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
