Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
