You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Randomize
