I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize