Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
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