Texts From Last Night

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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay

  (602): View more from Arizona

  I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"

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  (501): I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay (602): I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay" http://tfl.nu/cfbv
  Replies (20) Good night (4280) Bad night (977)
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.

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  (504): Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come. http://tfl.nu/6ryd
  Replies (75) Good night (5464) Bad night (734)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  dont start drinking without me

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  (215): is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor? (609): dont start drinking without me http://tfl.nu/ofdx
  Replies (47) Good night (5098) Bad night (1022)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".

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  (281): All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems". http://tfl.nu/zcya
  Replies (11) Good night (3864) Bad night (1525)
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  (315): View more from New York

  i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.

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  (315): i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night. http://tfl.nu/xhhx
  Replies (12) Good night (1616) Bad night (2924)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out

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  (403): That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out http://tfl.nu/2o0c
  Replies (8) Good night (4019) Bad night (1007)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.

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  (816): Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing. http://tfl.nu/pnzr
  Replies (1) Good night (1882) Bad night (703)
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  (925): View more from California

  Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday

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  (925): Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday http://tfl.nu/d2se
  Replies (10) Good night (726) Bad night (1634)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.

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  (+61): It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls. http://tfl.nu/jcbb
  Replies (1) Good night (1221) Bad night (576)
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  (415): View more from California

  I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go

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  (415): I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go http://tfl.nu/rt1y
  Replies (7) Good night (526) Bad night (918)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.

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  (512): There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls. http://tfl.nu/qrvu
  Replies (6) Good night (1551) Bad night (591)
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  (254): View more from Texas

  I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.

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  (254): I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits. http://tfl.nu/syex
  Replies (11) Good night (1245) Bad night (512)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole

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  (617): Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole http://tfl.nu/3dil
  Replies (7) Good night (2661) Bad night (462)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.

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  (210): If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you. http://tfl.nu/xqg1
  Replies (3) Good night (515) Bad night (303)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night

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  (602): So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night http://tfl.nu/kxy5
  Replies (1) Good night (375) Bad night (177)

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