Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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