carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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