I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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