ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize