I think I am morally bankrupt
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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