There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
