The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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