in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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