Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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