nut hugger
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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