How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Randomize