We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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