Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
