I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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