Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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