You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
