break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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