I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
