Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
