i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
