Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
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