He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Randomize
