He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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