New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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