So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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