WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
