Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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