What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
