Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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