Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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