i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Is Oprah even human
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Randomize
