ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
we're making bets on your personal life
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
