i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Randomize