Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Go christen that room with your naked body.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
