Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i already hear my dad disowning me
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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